I walk a road through this
life and reflect back on the paths I have chosen to make it to this time and
place.
I walk my own path…now
When I was 11, I walked the path set down by my parents.
Parents that really did not really want children but had five just to follow the laws
of the Roman Catholic Church.
Definition from Catholic Beliefs:
Birth Control
Since sex is meant for procreation purposes, married Catholic couples should
always be open to the possibility of a pregnancy. While family
planning is allowed, the use of contraceptives, both hormonal and barrier,
are not. Likewise, tubal
ligations and vasectomies
for purposes of contraception and sterilization are not acceptable, although
they may be done out of medical necessity.
They had all of us because the Church doctrine affirmed it. I’m sure they never asked
themselves if they were fit to be parents or the simple question of “Did we want kids?”
They just kept having us until the hit the magic number of 4….I was 5 ….an “accident” and
my mother cried when she found out she was pregnant with me.
The first 4 years of school I attended public school and went to church once a week
with my mother. I never saw the reasons for being there. The person in the front kept
spouting words that meant nothing to me…..talking about how guilty I was of this or that.
Even at young age, I could see what they were selling and did not want to buy into any of it.
Guilt is a great weapon…..a weapon of control
Then in the summer after 4th grade, I was told I would be attending Saint Clement Catholic
School….right down the road a piece….the place that had been selling all the guilt every
Sunday
I knew it……but did not know any of the Brothers…Sisters…or the Father (all in the catholic way)
So As I read the headlines now….How the Catholic Church looked the other way while their
shepherds abused children left and right….comes as no surprise to me
It seems ABUSE was more of a doctrine than the saving of us poor wretched souls
For the next 8 years I witnessed physical abuses and psychological torture
I would not inflict on a dog….let alone children given into care daily for the grace of god.
I saw kids beat with inch thick wooden rods…..hit with “paddles” 2 inches thick
with holes drilled in them for less wind resistance…don’t give them dirty guilty
little souls a break….
Many broken bones and humiliations……
Looking back with an almost DVD quality….I see the prerequisite to become a
PRIEST \ BROTHER \ or NUN was deep psychological affliction.
A firm hatred for others was at the top of a resume along with swing speed
and a propensity for degrading others
A saw very manly nuns and very effeminate men….
I have nothing against Lesbians or Homosexuals…..every human being has a right to love
BUT NOT WITH CHILDREN
And every human has a right to be angry
BUT NOT TO TAKE ALL OF LIFE’S FRUSTRATIONS out on little ones
I never saw parents come by to beat the nun that just wailed on their son with a broken collar bone…
Or the little girl paddled with her pants down in front of the class.
I would clear the den of evil if anyone touched my family….but all the
parents were programmed not to step in for it was god’s way
I’m writing this to tell you
all the newspaper’s headlines are TRUE
I know there is the flip of the coin ….there are good folks in those positions doing god’s work
I say to you “Yes there are…..but far from enough”
life and reflect back on the paths I have chosen to make it to this time and
place.
I walk my own path…now
When I was 11, I walked the path set down by my parents.
Parents that really did not really want children but had five just to follow the laws
of the Roman Catholic Church.
Definition from Catholic Beliefs:
Birth Control
Since sex is meant for procreation purposes, married Catholic couples should
always be open to the possibility of a pregnancy. While family
planning is allowed, the use of contraceptives, both hormonal and barrier,
are not. Likewise, tubal
ligations and vasectomies
for purposes of contraception and sterilization are not acceptable, although
they may be done out of medical necessity.
They had all of us because the Church doctrine affirmed it. I’m sure they never asked
themselves if they were fit to be parents or the simple question of “Did we want kids?”
They just kept having us until the hit the magic number of 4….I was 5 ….an “accident” and
my mother cried when she found out she was pregnant with me.
The first 4 years of school I attended public school and went to church once a week
with my mother. I never saw the reasons for being there. The person in the front kept
spouting words that meant nothing to me…..talking about how guilty I was of this or that.
Even at young age, I could see what they were selling and did not want to buy into any of it.
Guilt is a great weapon…..a weapon of control
Then in the summer after 4th grade, I was told I would be attending Saint Clement Catholic
School….right down the road a piece….the place that had been selling all the guilt every
Sunday
I knew it……but did not know any of the Brothers…Sisters…or the Father (all in the catholic way)
So As I read the headlines now….How the Catholic Church looked the other way while their
shepherds abused children left and right….comes as no surprise to me
It seems ABUSE was more of a doctrine than the saving of us poor wretched souls
For the next 8 years I witnessed physical abuses and psychological torture
I would not inflict on a dog….let alone children given into care daily for the grace of god.
I saw kids beat with inch thick wooden rods…..hit with “paddles” 2 inches thick
with holes drilled in them for less wind resistance…don’t give them dirty guilty
little souls a break….
Many broken bones and humiliations……
Looking back with an almost DVD quality….I see the prerequisite to become a
PRIEST \ BROTHER \ or NUN was deep psychological affliction.
A firm hatred for others was at the top of a resume along with swing speed
and a propensity for degrading others
A saw very manly nuns and very effeminate men….
I have nothing against Lesbians or Homosexuals…..every human being has a right to love
BUT NOT WITH CHILDREN
And every human has a right to be angry
BUT NOT TO TAKE ALL OF LIFE’S FRUSTRATIONS out on little ones
I never saw parents come by to beat the nun that just wailed on their son with a broken collar bone…
Or the little girl paddled with her pants down in front of the class.
I would clear the den of evil if anyone touched my family….but all the
parents were programmed not to step in for it was god’s way
I’m writing this to tell you
all the newspaper’s headlines are TRUE
I know there is the flip of the coin ….there are good folks in those positions doing god’s work
I say to you “Yes there are…..but far from enough”
